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The nesting instinct

April 4th, 2007 at 12:55 am

While reading Make Love, Not Debt, a his and hers blog about a couple and their money, and saw a comment that caught my eye...

"The nesting instinct will kill your finances... My advice is to stop collecting crap, and be content with what you have. Desire is the root of your problems, and desire leads to consumption, and consumption leads to being a wage slave for life..."

How true that is. Well I'm sure some folks have enough money to decorate their home and collect fine things but I think what the quote was trying to say was that those who don't have the means shouldn't go into debt or spend all their money on such things.

I sometimes wish our apartment were cuter. Maybe more colorful, with more artwork and furniture that matched. But most of the time I can walk into Macy's, drift aimlessly around and not buy anything. It helps that after our money is direct-deposited into savings we don't have alot left in the budget (i.e bank account) to shop. But a lot of it has to do with desire. I look around and don't see anything I want. And if I do, I simply carry it around long enough that it becomes a burden and I change my mind. But there are those rare cases that I see something, MUST have it, leave the store, obsese about it for days, then come back and buy it. Now that's when I know it's a good purchase!

8 Responses to “The nesting instinct”

  1. yummy64 Says:

    A home isn't about the stuff in it but the love in it!!!
    And I love your method for determining if you buy something. That wait a few days and wait to see if it still calls is such a great way to save money buy not impulse shopping!

  2. daylily Says:

    Don't feel bad about your apartment not being well decorated. You've got years and years. Wait until you buy a house before worrying about decorations.
    My DH and I are about 15-20 years older than you and we still have furniture from 20 years ago. It's old and faded but we don't care... We have retirement and savings accounts and that's what makes us feel good.

  3. Ima saver Says:

    I can really relate to your post. When I got remarried, my husband and I collected everything. I have 100 hummels, we have collector bottles, beer cans, civil war items, bells, etc. etc. Now, you don't know how much I wish we had all the money we spent on all that crap!! I can't sell it for what I paid for it 30 years ago, so I have to move it from house to house!! Take your money and save it. Money is much easier to move!!

  4. Joan.of.the.Arch Says:

    With things of beauty, sometimes it is enough just to have seen them and to know that they exist. I don't have to own them. So I can enjoy beautiful items in a store as though the store were a museum. Or I can think about the neighbor's living room and how cozy it feels their with their peruvian blanket hung on the wall and the small artwork they picked up when they lived in Santa Fe. But I don't feel the need to replicate what is in their home. I enjoy bringing it to mind and being there to visit. It is part of them, not me.

    Even when I have in mind to own something beautiful, I often stretch out the fantasy for a long time before I do it. One of my first blog notes here was about assembling a patio table artfully. I've been thinking about it for years and have so far acquired only the table, the purple table cloth, and a four great condiment dishes. I have in mind just the right placemats and plates, and will eventually buy or make them when the materials present themselves. In the meantime the table gets used with what we have and the pleasure of assembling just the right setting gives me pleasure across several years. I don't obsess about it; it does not feel covetous at all. It just feels ordinary and simple, slowly gathering something special. I don't feel like a capital C "Consumer" thoughtlessly saying yes to something which will no longer have meaning to me when the fad colors change in a year or two. I will have checked myself on whether I really want these things many times over some years before I acquire them. Hopefully, there will be not buyer's regret.

  5. madhaus90 Says:

    You're young and can add what you love when you find it. I live in a big house (after years in 900 square feet the last two of which had four kids!) and I couldn't afford to furnish it and have become the recipient of lots of furniture that wouldn't work in my dad's house. Very elaborate stuff - not my style at all and not practical at all with four kids. Now I feel that some of these rooms aren't a reflection of my family. Rather wish I'd waited till I could afford what I like!

  6. homebody Says:

    Just be sure that when you do buy something, make sure you love it, don't just buy what's cheap if you don't love looking at it.

  7. daylily Says:

    Joan.of.the.Arch..... what a great reply and what a great attitude. Thanks for sharing your insight.

  8. armyamy Says:

    Great post Joan.Of.The. Arch...you win my award for mvp (most valuable post) Smile Seriously though, that first sentence was truely beautiful.

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